Review: Toothbrush Timer29th Oct, 2013
The ugly toothbrush assistant you didn't ask for and probably don't need.
By the time we’re adults, we all have a pretty good grasp on how to brush our teeth. We may not do it as often as 9 out of 10 dentists recommend, but when we do, we know what we’re doing. Nonetheless, apps like Toothbrush Timer exist. Many of them are aimed at kids, but that’s no excuse to sacrifice quality.
If you’re concerned with ensuring you brush your teeth for a full 2 minutes as is recommended, a simple timer is all you need. But what if your timer could also show you a diagram of teeth and highlight the specific area you should be brushing? If you thought, “well shit, I’ve been needing that!” then I have great news! Toothbrush Timer will do just that, but damn, is it ugly.
I thought the splash screen for Panera Bread Locator was bad, but it’s a masterpiece compared to the overall scheme of Toothbrush Timer. It reminds me of a late 1990’s website, and that’s definitely a bad thing. The scribbled background, lack of contrast, and grotesque, Comic Sans-esque font make this one of the most hideous apps I’ve ever laid eyes on.
Not to mention the laughable job it does in highlighting where you should be brushing. The graphics were most likely created in MS Paint, and the highlighitng job is poorly done. It’s overly wide, which makes it pretty unspecific and only vaguely helpful. Better still is when it’s time to move on to the next region. Rather than simply move the highlight, the entire image of the teeth actually slides to the right to a whole new image. The whole ordeal is uneccessarily distracting.
Perhaps more annoying than that, though, are the sound effects. Every time the brushing region changes, it plays back a sound. Which is actually good, because audio feedback is enough to know to move on once you’ve learned the order areas are suggested in. The actual sound, however, kinda sucks. It’s a really cheap imitation of a chomping sound. And when it switches from the top row of teeth to the bottom, it emits an obnoxious beep. I’m all for variety, but something of higher quality (or at least something consistent), would be appreciated.
Though the app is free, it’s still a sorry excuse given its purpose. Whoever designed it has about as much design sense as an amateur 90’s web developer which sincerely cuts into its credibility in my mind. Though the app does also have the ability to track your last dentist appointment and when you replaced your toothbrush, a simple timer (like the one built in to iOS), will suffice if you want to ensure a full two minute brush time. If you’re dead-set on owning a toothbrush aide app, at least go for something a little more entertaining like Tooth Camp Lite.
Fortunately, you probably know how to brush your teeth and can skip the category entirely.
Toothbrush Timer: 5/5 piles of poo.